10 Signs She’s Cheating on You: Don’t Miss the Huge Red Flags

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Though many of us, myself included, would love to think that true love lasts forever, the reality isn’t always as we want it to be. Some men are notorious cheaters, as Sex & the City confirmed years ago.

Likewise, if you’re in a relationship with a lady, you should be aware of some telltale signs she’s cheating, no matter how much it hurts to know.

In general, humans love monogamy, but some find it a bit…restricting. They believe everyone deserves their love, body, etc. and they don’t mind sharing, not even if their partner does!

Why do women cheat? There isn’t one correct answer.

I’ve tried staying away from such behavior purely because I wouldn’t like anyone to cheat on me. I’ve seen girlfriends break down because of it, and I’ve seen my guy friends even shed some tears. Nobody deserves to be cheated on, as it’s basically lying about the purest thing we can all feel — love.

So, to help a friend out, even though you and I share a virtual friendship, let’s explore some of the signs you should be on the lookout for.

Top 10 Signs She’s Cheating on You

#1. The light’s on, but there’s no one there

Is your girlfriend a bit out of it from time to time? Are words leaving your mouth but she’s not responding? Brace yourself because this is one of the earliest signs she’s cheating.

There’s someone else who’s probably better at listening to what she has to say, so she doesn’t feel the need to talk to you. What’s more, there’s a good chance whatever you have to say doesn’t affect her now. She’s enjoying her affair and is probably fantasizing about the other person while you’re talking.

I know, I know — the truth sometimes hurts. One of the worst things that can happen to all of us is that we feel as if we’re invisible to our partner. Suddenly, the communication we once shared is practically non-existent — and it seems like the distance is slowly consuming us.

On the bright side, though, it helps to know this is one of those signs everyone can recognize and deal with, especially if you’re open to continuing the relationship after the cheating fiasco.

#2. She often talks about how unhappy she is — and makes it all seem like a joke

Now, given that I have many girlfriends who haven’t always been saints, I know a thing or two about women making jokes. And, let me tell you right now — when a woman says she’s unhappy, she’s rarely joking about it.

That’s one of the telltale signs she’s cheating, as it’s entirely honest. She’s giving you a chance to do something by saying what she feels, regardless of the fact she’s already sleeping with someone else.

Granted, we all have those moments when we go around the house and scream, “I cannot live like this anymore!” But there’s something about saying “I’m unhappy” that’s very…dark. So, we avoid saying it UNLESS we really mean it.

The problem is — are you listening to what she’s saying?

#3. You now have to fend for yourself because she just doesn’t care anymore

Oh, boy, if you’re suddenly doing all the chores around the house, washing your own laundry, and microwaving your own dinner — it’s time to assess your relationship.

Women love taking care of people, especially their partners. It’s in their nature to be “maternal,” and even those who don’t want to have children one day usually don’t mind taking care of someone. But, if the caring suddenly STOPS — then that could be one of the signs she’s cheating around.

#4. You’re not having sex that much, and when you are, there are no fireworks

When one of the partners is cheating, that’s always going to affect their sex life. Either both people will suddenly see sex as a burden, or they might not even want to make an effort.

Therefore, if you’re looking for signs she’s cheating, take a good look at your love life. If the sex is not great, she might be getting some of it somewhere else. Additionally, if she doesn’t even want to have sex — she might already have one foot out the door.

#5. But she’s still buying sexy lingerie

Weirdly enough, one of the strangest signs she’s cheating on you is when you’re barely having sex, but she’s still getting herself sexy bras and undies. One of my best friends started doing this too when her relationship was down in the dumps. And, when I asked her about it, she gave me an answer I would never have foreseen — “I need to feel sexy again.”

Sometimes, a long-term relationship loses that spark that actually led to it in the first place. When that happens, cheating is not that unusual.

Both partners might feel unwanted, and one of them might even lack self-esteem, just like my friend did. So, to make herself feel better and rerelease her inner sex goddess, she started investing in beautiful lingerie to please her lover.

#6. You’re spending less and less time together

Of course, another one of those telltale signs she’s cheating on you is if she’s trying to avoid spending time together.

Now, don’t get me wrong — when two people are in a relationship, that doesn’t mean they’re supposed to be connected with an umbilical cord. Both are still individuals, with their own thoughts and ideas, dreams, and wishes.

However — and I do have to stress this — for a relationship to work, it has to be nurtured. People have to spend time together in order to stay intimate and preserve the bond they share. Once they stop doing that, all hell breaks loose, and at some point, one of them might start cheating, purely because it needs to feel a connection with someone again.

#7. Yet, all of a sudden, she’s dolling herself up and going out every week

But what if…you guys aren’t spending time together BUT she’s suddenly really into going out with her girlfriends? What’s more, what if she’s taking extra care to look super nice while out?

Gone are the days of staying in and watching Netflix. Now, your girl prefers high heels, makeup, and going all out when it comes to her outfits.

Is this a sign you should worry? Of course it is. I know for a fact that women can get a bit too relaxed when they’re in a relationship.

Given that they’ve already “seduced” their partner, they can loosen up a bit and stop caring about how they look. So, logically, if she’s suddenly getting dolled up for no apparent reason — she might be cheating on you. There might be someone out there who she wants to impress!

#8. Her phone is glued to her hand

A sudden need for an extreme level of privacy is yet another one of those obvious signs she’s cheating. If at one point in the relationship she could leave her phone next to you without worrying that you might go snooping, then what changed in the meantime?

Sometimes, emotional cheating comes before physical cheating. When a person who’s in a long-term relationship suddenly feels they cannot trust their partner, it’s usually because they have something to hide.

Otherwise, why all the passwords on her phone? Why is she taking her phone to the bathroom? More importantly, why is her phone all of a sudden on silent mode?

#9. It seems EVERYTHING is all your fault

Of course, we all know that women can sometimes be a bit dramatic. I, for one, agree that PMS is real and that sometimes, we can act a bit unusual and…scary.

Still, one week of constant fighting is something everyone can handle. Months of it? Not so much.

Guilt is something that consumes people from within. It makes them a bit crazy, insecure, and rather paranoid.

Multiple fights can occur just because you asked your girlfriend something that had to do with betrayal, treason, cheating, etc. In fact, she might jump on each sentence because she doesn’t want you to know she’s cheating but would love to start a fight.

With each fight, she’s showing herself just how RIGHT she is for sneaking around with other people. Her defense mechanism will be put to good use, and she’ll try to turn everything against you and make you believe everything is your fault. One day, if you actually discover she’s cheating, she might even blame it all on you.

#10. She’s distancing herself by changing everything about her life

New hair? Check. New clothes? Check. A sudden urge to stay late at work for no apparent reason? Check. New interests, new dreams, and a fresh perspective on life? Check, check, and check.

One of the most convincing signs she’s cheating is if she has turned into an entirely new person. Suddenly, she doesn’t share the same interests with you, nor does she have the same ideas for your future together.

Essentially, the other person has made her distance herself from both you and the relationship — and changed her from within. How?

That other lover is something new and exciting, which has sparked her curiosity and her joie de vivre. Maybe she wasn’t actually happy with the relationship, and this has given her a way out, for at least a few hours each week until she decides what to do next.


So, what have we learned? If you’re wondering whether your relationship is about to go down the drain, try to recognize some of these signs your girl is cheating on you.

If you ask me, some of these are quite obvious and red flags you ought to do something about ASAP. They speak more about the quality of the relationship than the cheating itself, so you might even get a chance to remedy the situation a bit. In any case, even if this all goes down in flames, now you know what to pay attention to with your next girlfriend.

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Naomi Kizhner

Naomi Kizhner

On NaomiKizhner.com, I want to share tips, tricks, and quotes that will hopefully inspire someone who might be struggling. Also, I wish to help others find their true passion in life and cut out any negativity.
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